Diamonds are a Girl’s Best Friend. Especially after the Dentist.

“Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. The Sun Also Rises. Some of our best literature was born from brains that weren’t operating on all cylinders. Or perhaps just on different, previously unexplored cylinders. Thanks to one chemical substance or another.”

– Me, but I wanted to set it aside like it was a quote by someone important

* * * * * * * * * *

I went to the dentist today. My mouth is still very numb. And yet also very sore. (How does that happen, by the way?) I stopped off at the store on the way home because I really wanted mashed potatoes. I also bought some new strawberry beer and, now that I’m looking through the bags, black beans and stewed tomatoes. (I blame the meds.) Anyway, I just ate the mashed potatoes. Being freshly made and somewhat lumpy, they weren’t easy to eat … and I’m pretty sure I just bit off a chunk of my inner cheek. (I wish I was kidding.)

As the pain began setting in, I reclined a while on the sofa. (I used “reclined” here because I’m tired and paranoid about accidentally inverting the past tenses of lay and lie in my stupor.) And then I decided to distract myself with a little writing until my kids got home. (Thanks, Mom & Virginia for bringing them home today.)

You might remember a post I wrote recently about creating a mix tape for Dave for this birthday. I created it in response to a writing prompt called Twisted Mix Tape hosted by Jen Kehl each week. This week’s prompt asks for a Greatest Hits tape. And guess where my anesthetized brain went? (Remember, it’s a little swishy right now.)

Let’s get right to it as I’m getting a little sleepy. If I were to create a Greatest Hits tape … and I mean right now as I type from the sofa with a confused head full of deadening pain medication … here’s what I would title that cassette:

Neil Diamond’s Greatest Hits

Because it’s one of the first songs I ever learned to play on the guitar.

Because it reminds me of watching The Jazz Singer with my family as a kid. I think it was my mom’s favorite song. And the fact that it mentions New Orleans doesn’t hurt either.

Because Dave’s impression of him singing this song specifically pretty much sealed the deal for me 19 years ago.

Because I remember my dad singing it when he brought me to see Neil in concert when I was a kid. (I also remember hearing Heartlight that same night. Notice it did NOT make the list.)

Because it might just be the best karaoke song ever written.

* * * * * BONUS TRACK * * * * *

Because of “TODAY!!!”

* * * * * * * * * *

Thanks for easing my tooth pain today, Neil. And spending all afternoon fixing my hair and talking to Javier, the giant purple giraffe, and me on the sofa. You’re the best!


9 responses to “Diamonds are a Girl’s Best Friend. Especially after the Dentist.

  1. You’ve got some great reasons for liking those tracks 🙂 Hope your mouth’s better soon.

  2. Freakin’ Neil Diamond… Can’t go wrong with Neil. Like the “theme” too. Thanks for sharing, Slu

  3. I sent you some virtual hugs earlier, here are some more. I hope your mouth starts to feel much better tomorrow. 😀

  4. See you are so much braver than I would be. I need major dental work and my anxiety is so horrible that I went into a panic attack the last time I went and they refused to treat me without sedatives before I got there. I have never really been a Neil fan. I couldn’t tell you why.

  5. I learn little things about you and it makes me like you a little more.
    I’ve seen Neil in concert twice in my lifetime and I love both times, sure he’s cheesy and old school, but his songs come on and I smile, I sway, I bounce (and know all the words)

    Just like Barry, I don’t shy away from my true affection of him and his music (even if people make fun of me for it…)

    hoping you’re feeling better today.

  6. Stephanie @smtimmons

    My favorite Neil is Las Vegas Vacation Neil. So awesome. 🙂

    Hope you are feeling better. Tell Javi I said hi!

  7. You think you know someone and then you find out they have a giant purple giraffe named Javier. 😀

  8. I LOVE THIS LIST! My dad was a huge Neil Diamond fan, and so by default me too. I love all of those songs and would kiss you for not putting Heartlight on there if I could fly my ass over to Loooosiana. I also loved The Jazz Singer, although I have weird memories of it too. By the way you didn’t include William S Burroughs and Kurt Vonnegut, (actually I’m sure we can make that list go on and on and on)
    Miss you say hi to Javier!

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