Tag Archives: julia child

Stuff that happened this week that I thought was worth mentioning …


Today’s Weight … 120.8

It’s been five days since I checked in here. Glad to see that number down a bit. Pretty impressive considering the cheese consumption in this household this week. And we’re now headed into Mardi Gras weekend. The good news is … lots of walking. The bad … lots of food … and drink. Sigh. Promise to be honest with the stupid weigh-ins. Ugh.

Don’t get it? Check this post.

1. I attended a Polyphonic Spree concert with my brother and my friend, Vanessa. I realize most of you probably aren’t familiar with this band, so please allow me to pontificate. There’s something about their music (especially live) that elicits an inexplicable feeling of euphoria usually only indicative of a nice muscle relaxant. Or, well, something like that. Maybe it’s the 16 people taking the stage at once wearing choir robes and carrying with them an orchestra’s worth of instruments that sets them apart. I don’t know. And, because I’m a big dork, I stuck around after the concert to meet the band’s frontman, Tim DeLaughter (even his freakin’ name sounds happy) and snap a quick photo. I’ve included the picture as well as a shameless plug for the band (a video of their appearance on Scrubs in 2004 – Love this band. Love this show).

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2. While Googling the above song for a good video for this post, I was reminded of a movie (in which the song was used) that I always intended but never actually got around to seeing. (Story of my life.) So this week, thanks to Netflix, I watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Anyone besides me ever see it? That is one unconventional film. And it involves Jim Carrey in a serious (as opposed to manically stupid) role which (like Robin Williams) is always a good thing. I won’t ruin it for you by rehashing the whole plot. Just go see it for yourself some time and come back and tell me what you think.

3. Ellen DeGeneres used one of my jokes on her show this week. “ONE of my.” That’s funny. Like I have an arsenal or something. Anyway, she was seeking corny Valentine’s Day jokes and I tweeted her one. What’s that? Well, YES, I tweet. It’s 2012, McFly. (Great. Any hipness Twitter just bought me was erased by my cavalier use of ‘McFly.’)

4. I lost half of my face to a little snafu with a women’s skin care product, uncharacteristically cold weather and my own, full-on ignorance. Apparently, Retin-A does not double as a moisturizer. I’ll bet any woman worth her salt already knew that. In the area of cosmetics and girly savoir faire, I am not worth any salt, mine or anyone else’s. Which, apparently, is only about $2.99 per pound, thus rendering me pretty useless. Except that when I complained of my Retin-A debacle, one friend actually said I was ‘making leprosy cool.’ Um, thanks?

5. I made cheese. Yes, that’s right. I built it. From the ground up … or the milk up, as it were. There were powders, liquids, cooking thermometers and oversized, cauldron-y-looking pots involved. And then there was the whole curds-and-whey-separation, a rather tedious process. And kneading. Dear God, was there kneading. But, in the end, there was cheese. Mozzarella cheese. That we promptly used on a homemade pizza for dinner last night. I made cheese. (Sniff.) I may try walking on water later this weekend.

6. I watched my girl kick butt in her third year in the school talent show. She channeled a young Michael Jackson beautifully in her own take on ‘I Want You Back,” although I think she was going for Nickelodeon’s Victoria Justice who recently covered the old J5 song. And, as always, we got to see a lot of other kids strutting their best stuff on stage all evening. One of my favorite acts involved two nine-year-old white boys popping and locking better than a 1980s Alfonso Ribeiro. (Without googling him, please comment below if you actually know who I’m talking about. No cheating!)

7. With the help of a few friends, I compiled a list of of people we’d like to see cloned and sent it to @GeneticsView who (foolishly) decided to follow me on Twitter. They hung in there for most of my shenanigans but finally unfollowed me because, I think, I got greedy and asked for too many clones. Who was on the list, you ask? Using the input of others as well as my own ideas, we sent them the following names: Brad Pitt, Jane Russell, Johnny Depp, Julia Child, Bono, Ellen Degeneres and Orlando Bloom. We were really just getting started when they unfollowed. Cowards. What crappy customer service.

8. I learned that I am an unteachable monkey when it comes to the computer. As such, there will likely be many more ‘This is not a real blog post‘ blog posts until I get this crap straightened out. Feel free to ignore them.

9. I learned that I know someone who knows Paul McCartney. That’s only two degrees, people. Meaning YOU are only three degrees of separation from Sir Paul. Go run and update your Facebook statuses … now!

10. I accidentally emailed my kids’ teachers from my ‘tits’ email again. Bear in mind, my daughter’s teachers include a nun. Please say a prayer for me immediately.

11. I an effort to throw off the many cheesy porn autobots of the world, I tried reprogramming my Twitter account by using hashtags like #Osmonds, #GirlScouts, #PBS, #BillCosby, #7thHeaven, #milk, #Crazy8s and #Waltons. It worked, but only for about five hours.

12. I devoted a day of my life to thinking good thoughts about Doug Henning. Doug Henning, you guys! Am I the only one who misses his big, buck teeth? Did you know he was a magician, illusionist, escape artist AND politician? Didn’t see that one coming, did you? A moment of silence for Mr. Henning, please.


Oh, yeah. And we passed 25,000 hits on this six-month-old blog. Yay, us! Thanks to all for reading. Happy Mardi Gras! I’m off to THE paradeS. 

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Think the Food Network would consider producing a show hosted by ODNT?


Pay attention, my friends ...

… because this may well be the first and last blog entry you ever read from me offering recipes and help in the kitchen. Maybe it’s all the health craziness and anxiety I’ve been through the last month. Who friggin’ knows? But, for whatever reason, I felt inexplicably compelled … both after Thanksgiving and after Christmas … to create something really delicious and rib-sticking … from scratch … for my family.

And thus was born the opportunity for me to test drive the following two recipes, both of which had the word ‘carcass’ in their names. (That’s always a plus in cooking, right?)

After Thanksgiving, I made Turkey Carcass Soup. It involved a multitude of ingredients (nearly all of which needed to be purchased) as well as lots of chopping and dismembering of an Avian skeleton.  And, bear in mind, I am neither Julia Child nor Julie Powell, making aspics with calves’ feet and cleaving through marrow bones like lumber.  Still, if I had to single out the hardest part of this recipe, it was absolutely locating uncooked barley at the grocery store. It took three employees to find it for me … considering that the first two didn’t even know what it was.

After Christmas, I made Turkey Carcass Gumbo. That was today.  And it took me five hours. I even had to make a roux, which  was no small task and (shaming my name as a native New Orleanian) was a first-time effort. But I did it. And I’ve heard nothing but good reviews from five tasters so far. Pretty good for the short order, Hot-Pockets-are-my-Specialty cook who needs repeated lessons in simple rice making. (Right, Ashley?)

For both recipes, I used a carcass from a fried turkey. Yeah, I know that’s kind of cheating … in that there’s so much fatty, salty, seasoned goodness already seared into those bones. But, hey, these were the birds with which I had to work. So, don’t besmirch me the good fortune to have dined well for the holidays in the first place.

Oh, and while I’m at it, I should probably also share the gingerbread recipe I used this season. All of my children’s teachers got a little care package before they left for the holidays.

Every one of my close friends is reading this post with their mouths hanging open right now. Either wondering why I’ve been holding out on them for so long … or what past Shirley MacLaine-ian life has taken over my body in the last month. (MotherMeetsTheRoad, eat your heart out!)


Anyway, I promise I’m fine. I’m just having some fun and making a mess with my kids in the kitchen. So, it’s actually a good time to stop by for a visit. There’s always something good in my fridge these days. And who knows how long my wild cooking spree will last?

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Getting by with a little help from my friends


 As promised, here is the original appeal I made to my girlfriends for help with the project … and their wonderfully supportive responses.

Q:

 Hi, ladies.

If you’re receiving this email, it’s because I consider you a close friend and wanted to include you in a project I’m getting ready to take on.  Before I go any further, please look above at the ‘send to’ line.  You have all been blind copied on this message for your own benefit. Why?  Because it’s about boob jobs … and I consider you all experts on the subject but know that most, if not all, of you will not want to be outed.  I totally respect that.  Personally, I’m planning to take a different route.

 As a 42-year-old mother of two who basically exercises and eats right every day, I’m tired of looking at the deflated version of what I used to have up there.  Some of you have even had the honor of seeing them in person.  Those of who have know where I’m coming from.

So … I’m now looking into the possibility of an upgrade … but that’s not all. In the interest of keeping my promise to myself to return to writing when my school job ended, I’ve decided to go public … very public… about this whole project.  Blog-style.  (I still can’t admit I’m planning to write a blog without feeling a little dorky. When, oh when, will I get over that?)

Those of you who have seen the movie ‘Julie & Julia’ will know just what I mean.  The difference here is that, instead of writing a blog about cooking 500+ French recipes created by Julia Child inside of a year, I will be documenting the full process of what women go through when pursuing a boob job, first-hand. Every detail of the project will be included in the journal …. from arriving at the decision and telling my family … to interviewing doctors and maybe buying some new bras. And everything in between.

And I want you all to be a part of the whole process.  I will fully respect your anonymity and give you another name (of your choosing) and would love to be able to tap your brains and use your insight for me personally as well as in the blog with your permission.

 What do you say?  Care to be my personal consultants?  Any thoughts to share with me already? I can’t wait to hear from you all.  Love you guys.

 Michele

A:

I’d love to do it, and I’m fine with using my real name.  I’ve been pretty open about my ‘enhancements.’ I hope you enjoy yours as much as I’ve enjoyed mine. – Anne

What a cool idea! I’ve always suspected you had a writer’s soul. You are probably like me, in that you analyze, soul-search, etc. before you make this kind of decision, but you ultimately decided to do it for yourself — not because of external pressure. I think there are a lot of women who have grappled with the same thing, and would appreciate some candid blogging on the subject. You can feel free to pick my brain! – Cindy

I love mine … thrilled that I did it! Where are you in your decision-making process? You can see and/or feel mine (after a few glasses of wine … haha!) if you’d like! I did that with a friend to see what I thought before I saw her doctor. – Elizabeth

Ha!!! I absolutely LOVE this. I would love to be a part of your boob journey. My first piece of advice is to think long and hard about what size you would like. Everyone, including the docs, will tell you that you will wish you had gone bigger. I totally disagree!!! I actually wish I would have gone smaller. Big boobs can give the illusion of extra weight. Put a lot of thought into your size. Good luck.  I’m here for you whenever you need me. – Hannah

I’m definitely on board and you can use my real name.  I’m very comfortable with my decision, so ask away.  I’d happy to answer anything that you or anything else wants to know. – Kelly

(A friend) suggested I do a boob blog last year.  Unfortunately, I am not a skilled writer.  Glad to see that you are doing it.  And, yes, I am your best source for information. – Mary

Awesome!!! I am 3 years post boob job and have zero regrets. I’ll be happy to have you pick my brain. I clearly remember deciding between 3 doctors and picked the one who wanted to be smallest. The buying new bras was funny because in the beginning I bought bras that minimized my look and now I buy push-up bras with padding. Haha! Look forward to talking to you. – Megan

You can officially count me in to be a part of The Expert Panel, The Dream Team, Babes with Boobs, Not So Itsy Bitsy, Lifted with Love, The Boobilicious Society, etc.  You can use my real name. I don’t mind talking about my journey and how it relates to your boob case. And, if anyone learns a little more about breast cancer awareness from my comments, then that’s a bonus. – Melissa

Nothing to hide!!! Real name is fine by me.  The “girls” have been up front all these years, so why not me? You will love the new additions!  Any questions I might be able to answer, just ask. – Paige

I have lived through the roller coaster of emotions and know the feeling of excitement when the ride finally stops and you take a deep breath, give sneaky grin and say– God, I am glad I did it!! I am here to support you and the girls until they are able to support themselves. And, oh, what a wonderful day to know they can be out there on their own, not drooping over a wire that I never completely understood. – Red

Of course! And I got a mini-lift at the same time – look into it. I don’t care who knows.  My name is fine. Good luck, Michele.  I love your idea.  You will be thrilled and will probably wonder why you didn’t do it sooner. – Vineen

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