Guapo: (drumming fingers on desk) What are YOU going to write?

Me: (sucking down coffee) I don’t know. (rocking back and forth on haunches) I’m trying to think.

Guapo: You know the other girls are already done, right? Lance, too. I think he even set his to music.

Me: (rolling eyes) I know. I heard. (sighing defeatedly) Mel makes this look so damned easy on According to Mags.

Guapo: (shrugging shoulders) Well, in her defense, she does have two adorable kids.

Me: (rising to feet defensively) And …?

Guapo: (recoiling in fear) Calm down. Your kids are great, too. I just meant hers were still little.

Me: (shaking head & sitting) Oh, my God. I know. I’m sorry. I just (starting to cry) … I mean, how does she do it?

Guapo: I don’t know, Michele. I don’t know. (refilling coffee cup) Maybe it’s a West Virginia thing.

I’m writing this post today for my friend, Mel at According to Mags. Today is her birthday. And a few of her writing pals and I got together to assemble this little surprise. To view her other birthday salutes, be sure to click the links for all of my fellow party givers listed at the bottom of this post.

But let’s talk a little more about Mel. She and I met online via our love of writing. Just like eHarmony … but for like-minded friends. We even traveled and roomed together last month for a writing conference in NYC. And … when neither stole the other’s kidney, uploaded naked shower pictures to the internet or stood over staring creepily at the other while sleeping … we deemed it a success.

So, without further verbosity on my part, please allow me to share The Best of Mel (According to ODNT). Go visit her when you can and say hi. You won’t be sorry. She’s a lovely, do-anything-for-you, give-you-the-shirt-off-her-back kind of girl. But, seriously, if you’re only going to get her shirt … well, dude, you’re a creeper. Move on.

Check out some of my favorite ATM posts:

• If You Take a Mags to the Movies (We call this one the ‘penis post.’ Sure, it gives it away … but it also makes you read it.)
• America’s (but not Mags’) Favorite Pastime  (She tells a great story in pictures. And song.)
• Here Comes the Sun (Where she has a cathartic moment after a helluva health journey this summer.)
• The 80 Movies I Haven’t Seen From the 80s (Seriously, go make fun of her for some of these. Or make recommendations.)
• Finding my Way Back (Because she’s a runner. And almost as athletic as me. Stop laughing!)
• The Fire (A more serious piece that I hope she finds the time to develop fully someday. I know the feeling, Mel. I know the feeling.)

I could go on and on. But you can stop by her place any time and see for yourself. Just be sure to leave everything where you found it. I’m not sure if Mel’s a the-ceramic-penguin-always-faces-due-south-kind-of-person or not, so let’s not tempt fate. I do not wish to be hobbled.

(DID YOU SEE THAT MOVIE, MEL? WELL, DID YOU?)

Oh, and before I go, if you didn’t already see it, Mel and I are starting a little project today called ‘Ketchup with Us.’ It’s a semi-monthly writing exercise that we’ll be hosting on both of our sites. To learn more about it, you can read Mel’s post or mine after you finish snooping through all of her other stuff above.

Happy Birthday, Mel. Wish I was there in person to celebrate!

Click to meet my partners in crime for Mel’s birthday party:

• Guapo
• Lance
• Amy
• Becky
• Kari & Donna