The Baby Food Diet – Wrap-Up!


BEFORE YOU READ THIS POST ….  I highly recommend reading the following posts first. And, by “highly recommend,” I mean you’re not going to know what the snot I’m talking about unless you do. Don’t worry. They’re not long. As I am mostly illiterate.
A Quick Explanation of my Shenanigans
The Daily Journals … Day OneDay TwoDay ThreeDay FourDay Five

Seriously, read those first. …. Don’t just keep reading. … It will be much funnier and make much more sense. I promise! Have I ever lied to you before?!!?

Today’s Weight – 117.3

I am somewhere between 5’3″ and 5’4.” I am not a crazy person. Well, mostly not a crazy person. I would love to be 115 pounds for Christmas. Do I expect to reach that goal during this five-day experiment? Probably not. I’m weak and it’s only five days. Still, I figured any weight I could shave off BEFORE the onslaught of holiday gluttony is a good thing, right? Of course right.

I just made myself laugh. (That happens more than it probably should.) I was writing today’s wrap-up and creating a link to yesterday’s post. And I entered the same codes I’ve been using every day. For example, yesterday’s installment entitled “Baby Food Diet – Day 5” would be abbreviated to “BFD – Day 5.” B – F – D. Baby Food Diet. Of course, that’s not how Urban Dictionary defines it. Their interpretation is a little different. A little stronger …

Big … F(hi, Mom!)ucking … Deal

I like the parallel meanings for the acronym. And I think they both apply here. Because it is a pretty BFD that I managed to stick to the BFD for five straight days with no cheating. I really wanted to do it. To see if I could. To challenge myself a little. To laugh at myself a lot. And to write about all of it. So, to close things out properly, I conducted a little interview with myself today. It was tricky getting an appointment with me. I am apparently a very busy person. And I don’t always return my calls. But I finally tracked me down to ask a few questions. Here’s how it went.

Q: Thanks for agreeing to meet with me today on such short notice. Tell us how you heard about the diet. And would you recommend it?

“Well, The Baby Food Diet is one of the crazier get-thin-quick fads to come out of Hollywood. It’s credited to celebrity trainer Tracy Anderson and linked to actresses like Jennifer Aniston, Reese Witherspoon, Gwyneth Paltrow, Lady Gaga and Marcia Cross. And, while I certainly don’t recommend it as a lifestyle, it’s an easy way to drop a few pounds quickly before a big event you might have on the weekend.”

Q: Will you ever do it again?

“Who knows? Maybe … if I ever have three days to fit into a dress or something. Honestly, after the third day, my body adjusted to the lack of salt and sugar, like a Sugar Busters dieter, and I felt fine. I even got to where the food didn’t taste too bad. Except that blasted Macaroni & Cheese. I’m going to have nightmares about that one for a long time.” (insert canned laughter)

Q: How was it going back on real food?

“I was a little nervous about the transition. I didn’t want to jump in too quickly and shock my digestive system. So, oddly enough, the first thing I ate was squash soup. Not my recipe but something I bought from Williams-Sonoma. It’s not a far cry from the stuff I’ve been sustaining myself on for the last five days. Still, there were small bits of garlic in it and the whole thing had plenty of grown-up seasonings … including salt! It didn’t take much to fill me up. And isn’t that sort of the point of a diet?”

Q: And what about your big epicurean feast tonight?

“That question can probably best be answered in picture. So to close out the BFD series, I want to share a photo journal of my evening with the family at Bud’s Broiler, a New Orleans institution since the 1950s. As you can see, I absolutely hated it.” (more canned laughter, mixed with a little booing from a few audience members who don’t get the joke)










That concludes our Baby Food Diet series.

So until the next inspiration of perfect dumbassery hits … Ta-Ta!


Revisiting an old favorite for MamaKat’s writing prompt asking for a blog post inspired by the word challenge. This post is the last in a series (all posts leading up to it are linked at the top of this one) about following a strict BABY FOOD DIET CHALLENGE for five days! I definitely started to get a little oatmeal-headed there at the end.

19 responses to “The Baby Food Diet – Wrap-Up!

  1. I’ll be honest. I’m a little sad to see the end to these, but am happy you’re eating real food again. 🙂 Congrats!

  2. Enjoyed that, looking forward to the next dumbassery

  3. I kept getting this wierd Police sone in my head as I read your post. “A goo-goo-goo. A ga-ga-ga. is all I want to say to you.” I’m impressed that you did the diet complete and you definitely dereseved that hamburger!

    Hats off to you. 🙂

  4. Freud would have a field day with this one!
    As for me, I had a blast! I’m going to have to make time to visit more often, but for now, thank you! Great pics, by the way!

  5. Congrats MIchele! You look fab! I have to disclose that I fell off the wagon on day 4. My mother came up from FL for a surprise visit to go to my daughter’s swim meet and immediately I was in trouble. She did not approve of the BFD and felt that I was not setting a “good example” for my daughter, etc.. We had a rough weekend so, there you go!! The BFD was definitely one of the top 3 dumbass diets I have ever tried! Here’s to 2013 and a whole new year of dumbass diets to try! 😉

    • Honestly, if you made it to day FOUR, then I am very impressed. Sorry I got you in trouble with your mom. Mine wasn’t wild about it either but I finally convinced her that (a) I was actually probably eating healthier because my diet was so basic and salt/sugar free and … more importantly … (b) it was only for five days. 🙂

  6. I think you should incorporate the baby food into regular meals.
    That will keep your family on their toes!

    “Mom, this mac and cheese is delicio- OH MY GOD – WHAT WAS THAT?!?”

  7. I never knew that was a Hollywood diet! I’m sorry, I don’t think I could take that consistency for more than a day! Did you drink wine with your strained peas?

    PS I love the cheese fry action shot!

  8. Pingback: Death to Gluten! | OldDogNewTits

  9. I read this post while eating pizza – clearly I am not cut out for any diet.

    • Remember it was only for 5 days. And I did it publicly. VERY publicly. On purpose. That helped.

      And I so feel you. If I’d been able to have a third child, his or her name would have been Pizza. Pizza Poche.

  10. Pingback: The Road to Disney World is Paved with Good Intentions | OldDogNewTits

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