I pulled into my driveway last night and spied a curious, oversized, rectangular package leaning against the side door of the house. And, since someone in this family has a birthday coming up, I got a little excited. A little prematurely excited.
The backstory? My boy, Dean, and his friend partnered up for their final math project this past school year. It was HUGE. As in five feet long. And any parent who has raised a child above the age of seven knows exactly how it feels to bring home your child’s model solar system/(mal)functioning volcano/perfect replica of the Mayflower. He worked tirelessly for hours on it. He poured his little heart and soul into it. He’s so damned proud of it. Plus it’s usually such a great addition to your home decor and can only enhance the look of any room.
So, how in the hell could you ever think of parting with it. … Right?
Here’s where group projects are great. Only one of the kids gets to take it home. It’s like the Judgment of Solomon. No one who truly loves that stupid project could stand to see it divided so that all may partake of it. Thus, it can only go to one home. And if you’re really lucky, it’s not yours. Such was the case with our recent enormous math project.
Bear in mind that Hershey-zilla is sitting atop my fireplace hearth … and therefore is even WIDER.
Attached to my beautiful new gift was the following note:
Dear Poche Family,
We, the (name omitted out of SHEER kindness) Family, have been SO selfish and we greatly apologize! We have been enjoying the giant Hershey bar for over two weeks and did not even realize that SO much time has gone by as it sat and sat and sat in our den!
We are truly NOT a selfish family. So, in the spirit of fairness, we feel … no, we KNOW that the right thing to do is to hand over the giant candy bar so that your family can bask in the glory of the 98A.
The (again, name omitted … but if we have to keep this thing too long, who knows?) Family
P.S. Mrs. (teacher’s name at whose home we’ll be secretly dropping off the giant candy bar later this week) suggested hanging it above the TV in the den.
* * * * * * * * * *
If only it were real. I’d be busy eating instead of blogging right now. (Dork.)
I want chocolate.
* * * * * * * * * *
Curious to know if there’s more to this story? Well, yeah. Actually, there is. Click here.