Admit it. You’ve got valuable square foot in your fridge being taken up by crap that you can’t even eat. I didn’t realize until recently just how many “innovative” kitchen gadgets and other assorted pieces of useless garbage had been cluttering mine. So, naturally, I took it upon myself to remove all of these items one by one, photograph them, write about them on the internet and then shove them all back inside the appliance.

Because it’s what any sane person would do.

And with that, I give you …

1. Assorted cold packs. Because they’re great for treating things like headaches, sore forearms and circumcised toes.

2. Chilled beer mugs. Because only peasants drink out of the bottle. P.S. I am a peasant. These belong to Dave.

3. Vivien’s new Williams Sonoma ice cream maker. Because she loves ice cream. My jury is still out on this one.

4. Dave’s Slushy Magic. Because he loves slushy stuff. My jury is not still out on this one. We reached a verdict: Crap.

5. Dave’s Chillsner. (Or was it the Beersicle? I can’t remember.) Because it was billed the “perfect Christmas gift” last year. Unfortunately, remember #2. Dave doesn’t drink out of the bottle. Stupid me.

6. Vivien’s first communion wreath. Because … I have no joke here. Well, except for the fact that it’s more than four years old. (cough)hoarder!(cough)

7. Vivien’s snow … I mean ice … (Fine!) I mean SNOWball. Because Vivien made a ball of dirty ice (the size of a healthy cantaloupe, mind you) during the much anticipated snow threat we had earlier this year. And she just won’t let me throw it out.

8. Suppositories. Because sometimes … hey, shut up!

What about YOU?

Got anything weird in your fridge?

(Serial killers need not respond.)

June is Blog Post by Numbers Month. Wanna play with Mel and me? Just write a “listy-type” post with a number in the title (ex. FOUR Reasons I Love Mayonnaise, SIX Things You Can Do With A Paper Clip). Then link back to us and tweet us about it so we can include you on June 30th in our final list: (Number-Yet-To-Be-Determined) Great Bloggers Who Played the Blog Post by Numbers Game!