Tag Archives: according to mags

Ketchup With Us #7

Posted on December 1, 2012 | 7 comments

Food, glorious food! Hot sausage and mustard!
While we’re in the mood, cold jelly and custard!
 Pease pudding and saveloys! What next is the question?
 Rich gentlemen have it, boys … In-di-gestion!

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A marriage of musical theater and food. How could I not use this song here? Plus, Oliver is one of my favorite shows. Although I will confess that, until today, I thought the lyrics read “Peas, pudding and saveloy.” What the heck is pease pudding, you ask? Yeah. I had to know, too. (pause for Googling) Per Wikipedia, pease pudding is “a term of British origin regarding a savory pudding dish made of boiled legumes.” And, for the record, a saveloy is “a type of highly seasoned sausage, usually bright red in colour, which is typically available in English fish and chips shops, sometimes fried in batter.”

Refried beans and fried hot dogs. Mmmmmmm. Brits are as whack about food prep as I am. Still, I manage to have a few good meals up my sleeve. Which is disgusting and usually makes a huge mess. So, in the spirit of giving, I thought I’d share one of my recipes here with you. Today. Right now. (Sigh. Eyes Rolling.) Yes … fine. I’ll wait while you go grab a pencil.

ODNT’s Squash Soup

  • Winter squash – acorn, butternut, pumpkin, etc. (12 oz – ish)
  • 1 baking potato
  • 2 cans (14 1/2 oz. each) chicken broth
  • 1 tbsp. olive oil
  • 2 medium onions, diced
  • 1/4 tsp. cinnamon
  • 1/4 tsp. ginger
  • 1/8 tsp. nutmeg
  • 2 tbsp. maple syrup
  • 1/4 c. heavy cream

Halve the squash and potato. Bake face down (it’s more humane) at 350 until very soft. The pain-in-the-ass potato will take longer so plan to remove your more compliant squash (or is it squashes?) a little earlier. I think this process took about an hour but I can’t remember because my neighbor sent over champagne.

Once the vegetables are Gerber quality, start pureeing them in small batches with the chicken broth to make a creamy mash.  A food processor is the ideal tool for this process which is, of course, why I use a blender. (Consequently, my soups, smoothies, hummus and adult freezy drinks all have a similar squashy-banana-with-chick-peas-and-booze flavor.)

Saute onions in olive oil. (Or skip this step like me, since Dave hates onions, and just use onion powder.) Add all other spices. (Put the measuring spoons away, fool. A few generous shakes of each is fine.) Add everything to the veggie mash and heat in a large pot on the stove.

Finally, right before serving, add the maple syrup and heavy cream (the only sin in the pot). I do it that way because it’s what I was told to do years ago. Personally, I eat the soup for days after I cook it and I’ve never died (not even once) from chilling and reheating the cream. But then, I’m a reckless hooligan.

Oh, and enjoy the soup. It’s pretty damned good on a cold fall day.

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For a quick explanation of this link-up, click here. In short, Mel and I will post a picture or video with a writing prompt on the 1st and 15th of every month. You can write your entry in any form. We love creativity. And, with each prompt, we’ll feature a writer from the previous link-up. Which reminds me …

Our esteemed Ketchup With Us Featured Writer for today is …

Wyman Ragg

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The Rules of Play

  1. Submit your entry using the linky at the bottom of one of our KWU posts.
  2. Follow us on Facebook (Michele /Mel).
  3. Follow us on Twitter (Michele/Mel) & tweet us your entry with the hashtag #KetchupWithUs.

Grab our Button!

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‘KETCHUP WITH US’ – Prompt #7

Share a favorite holiday recipe with us. For once, there is no Heinz-inspired word limit. Just don’t go overboard. (God, I HATED that movie.)

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Ketchup With Us #6

Posted on November 15, 2012 | 23 comments

It’s Thanksgiving … and all everyone is talking about is counting their blessings. And taking stock of their lives. And reflecting on what they’re thankful for. Blah … blah … blah. I think I’m gonna puke. Here at ODNT and AccordingToMags.com, we want you to do something a little different.

RANT ABOUT SOMETHING YOU COULD LIVE WITHOUT! Here’s mine. I call it … “My Period.”

Every month, you arrive like clockwork. Except when you don’t.

It’s ALWAYS a bad time for your visit.

In your company, I am fat, I am pained and I am moody.

White is not an option. Especially because there will be chocolate.

And please stop suggesting swimming and horseback riding.

It is NEVER going to happen.

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For a quick explanation of this link-up, click here. In short, Mel and I will post a writing prompt on the 1st & 15th of every month. All you need to do is respond in 57 words or less. In any form. We love creativity. And, with each prompt, we’ll feature a writer from the previous link-up. Which reminds me …

Our esteemed Ketchup With Us Featured Writer for today is …

Hastywords

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The Rules of Play

  1. Follow us on Twitter (Michele/Mel) and Facebook (Michele /Mel).
  2. Post the ‘Ketchup With Us’ button (below) in your post.
  3. Link your entry’s URL to the linky at the bottom of one of our posts.
  4. Tweet your post to both of our handles with the hashtag #KetchupWithUs so we can RT you.
  5. Please turn off your captcha. It’s so easy a caveman could do it.

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‘KETCHUP WITH US’ – Prompt #6

In 57 words or less, tell us about something you’re NOT thankful for.

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And one more thing … Congratulations to Deana & Kari!

They scared our pants off with their entries and scored autographed copies of The Underwear Book by New York Times Bestselling Author Todd Parr.

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The Trail of Tears (This one has nothing to do with Native Americans or Billy Ray Cyrus)

Posted on November 14, 2012 | 30 comments

 Remember my friend, Trifecta? Well, he (or she … I’ve never been sure) is turning one this month and celebrating with a special writing prompt that can only be completed with a partner. Not surprisingly, I’m working with Mel at AccordingToMags.com. She wooed me actually. I was so flattered. She is the yin to my yang. The Ernie to my Bert. The Peaches to my Herb. The … whatever. She. Completes. Me.

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So … here’s the prompt Trifecta put up this week.

  • Charts and optimal dates and preferential temperatures. One line or two. As if she could summon whatever it is that makes up the human soul as easily as she could a cab on a busy New York avenue.

And … here’s Mel’s additional 33-100 words.

  • And just like the cabs that passed her by, ignoring the urgency in her body language, she felt herself losing hope that she would never get to where she desperately wanted to go. Maybe those missed moments were meant to steer her in another direction? She feared waiting too long and with each step forward, she began to lose sight of her original plan. Luckily, she had left a trail of tears along the way to help guide her back.

Now … enter me. I’m supposed to write 33-100 more words to link here. And we’re in SUCH a deep and earnest place. *PANIC*

  • Sadly though, she was completely unaware of the heat wave that would soon befall her fair city. And the same tears that COULD have carried her home now sizzled on the steaming pavement beneath her feet, disappearing into the air and creating a fog that would serve to blind her and lead her forever astray.

OFFICIALLY, my entry ends here. That’s what Mel and I agreed upon. There were originally three more sentences Mel and I elected to leave out. And I understand why Mel gently suggested they hit the cutting room floor. Still, I think anytime you can work German pork products into a story, you totally should. UNOFFICIALLY, of course. So close your eyes, Trifecta. Here’s the coda.

  • Plus, now she was craving something that sizzled. Like a good knockwurst. Which, ironically, probably meant that she was, in fact, finally pregnant.

Good Lord. Sometimes I exhaust myself.

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Ketchup With Us #5

Posted on November 1, 2012 | 10 comments

When Mel and I first came up with this KWU prompt, I knew right away who I’d be calling for a story. My friend, Vanessa, experienced some seriously crazy chiz in an apartment she leased with her husband during their first year of marriage. The actual story is a rather lengthy and deeply disturbing one that I forced myself to cull down to fit the 57-or-less mold. Every word of it is (gulp) true.

Every day, lights flickered and knobs twisted independently. Pictures turned eschew. The thermostat inexplicably vacillated between 55 and 90. Fixtures fell from the ceiling and the armoire door swung open every night. At 3am precisely. A neighbor finally spoke up. The last tenant in the apartment had been gruesomely murdered. And the crime was never solved.

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For a quick explanation of this link-up, click here. In short, Mel and I will post a picture or video with a writing prompt on the 1st and 15th of every month. All you need to do is respond in 57 words or less. In any form. We love creativity. And, with each prompt, we’ll feature a writer from the previous link-up. Which reminds me …

Our esteemed Ketchup With Us Featured Writer for today is …

Edward Hotspur

The Rules of Play

  1. Follow us on Twitter (Michele/Mel ) and Facebook (Michele /Mel).
  2. Post the ‘Ketchup With Us’ button (below) in your post.
  3. Link your entry’s URL to the linky at the bottom of one of our posts.
  4. Tweet your post to both of our handles with the hashtag #KetchupWithUs so we can RT you.
  5. Please turn off your captcha. It’s the right thing to do … and the tasty way to do it.

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‘KETCHUP WITH US’ – Prompt #5

In 57 words or less, tell us a ghost story … real or fiction.

Oh, and ONE … MORE … THING! This week, Mel and I will choose two entrants to receive an autographed copy of ‘The Underwear Book’ by New York Times Best Selling Author Todd Parr. Simply SCARE THE PANTS OFF EVERYONE with your entry! So go. Go NOW! Seriously, what are you waiting for?!!?

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Ketchup With Us #4

Posted on October 15, 2012 | 14 comments

Halloween is looming so Mel & I have decided to scare the __________ out of ourselves.

(Choose as many as apply.)

  1. heck/hell/snot/crap/shit
  2. daylights (living, everliving and everloving )
  3. dickens
  4. bejesus
  5. wits/willies

It’s time to Ketchup With Us about horror films. I am an enormous coward in this area. Which is why I expect a huge thank you from each and every one of you for the field work I put into this writing prompt. With the moral support of my friend, Vanessa, I summoned every shred of my courage to drag myself to see the latest screamer to hit theaters – House at the End of the Street. Seriously, since I saw that horrifying movie last week, I have lain (I hate that stupid word) in bed having to pee but paralyzed for an hour in the middle of the night. More than once. Thanks to my crippling fears, I’m probably well on my way to a UTI.

But this behavior is nothing new for me. I think it all started with this movie. (You go ahead and watch. I’m covering my eyes and ears.)

(Peeking from under hands) Is it over? Okay, good. For a quick explanation of this link-up, click here. In short, Mel and I will post a picture or video with a writing prompt on the 1st and 15th of every month. All you need to do is respond in 57 words or less. In any form. We love creativity. And, with each prompt, we’ll feature a writer from the previous link-up. Which reminds me …

Our esteemed Ketchup With Us Featured Writer for today is …

Welcome to Grand Central

The Rules of Play

  1. Follow us on Twitter (Michele/Mel ) and Facebook (Michele /Mel)
  2. Post the ‘Ketchup With Us’ button (below) in your post.
  3. Link your entry’s URL to the linky at the bottom of one of our posts.
  4. Tweet your post with the hashtag #KetchupWithUs AND both of our handles so we know to RT you.
  5. Please turn off your captcha. Every time a blogger turns off captcha, an angel gets its wings.

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‘KETCHUP WITH US’ – Prompt #4

In 57 WORDS OR LESS, retell the plot line of your favorite horror movie. And, if you can find a good one, be sure to include a movie clip of your own. (God, I’m gonna be so freakin’ scared going through these entries. )

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Death Takes A Holiday – Part 3 (for Trifecta)

Posted on October 10, 2012 | 26 comments

For this week’s Trifecta challenge, I’m teaming up with two of my favorite writers to bring you a spooktacular (yes, I said spooktacular) Halloween trilogy. Our  instructions are simple.  Create a story between 33 and 333 words using the 3rd definition of the following word:

DEATH
1a : a permanent cessation of all vital functions : the end of life
b : an instance of dying <a disease causing many deaths>
2a : the cause or occasion of loss of life <drinking was the death of him>
b : a cause of ruin <the slander that was death to my character — Wilkie Collins>
3 capitalized : the destroyer of life represented usually as a skeleton with a scythe

And, before you read any further, I will explain that my entry represents the third and final installment of this story. Thus, I strongly encourage you to read Part 1 (penned by my friend, Mel at AccordingToMags) and Part 2 (penned by the incomparable El Guapo) before mine. Only then can my entry be best appreciated. Enjoy!

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Death Takes A Holiday – Part 3

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Death and George crowded into the restaurant while Nausea headed over to the bar. “I can do some real damage in there. They’re running a tequila special,” he called out, running ahead of the other two.

“Dimwitted dilettante,” Death condescended under his noxious breath. George laughed, remembering a time when his old friend had that same insatiable glimmer in his apocalyptic eye. “Why are you smiling, George?” Death asked, as the hostess escorted them to their usual booth. “Are you amused by his enthusiasm … or have I unintentionally entertained you in some way?”

“Don’t you remember?” George began. “There were none more eager than you. But now … CPR, defibrillators, the Heimlich Maneuver. Why have you allowed these measures to interrupt your delicate work?” George was just getting started when the waitress interrupted him. “Good evening, gentlemen. Will anyone else be joining you?” Nausea was now bellying up to his third victim since they’d arrived. “No. Just the two of us,” answered Death, matter of-factly. “And we’d like to start with a couple of glasses of Richebourg Grand Cru.”

“Yes, of course, sir. Are we celebrating anything special?” she asked. “Yes,” answered Death. “My friend and I are celebrating my first holiday. A day off for Death. Do you know there’s no way you can die today, young lady?”

“I beg your pardon?” she stammered.

“I said that you cannot die today.” Death explained. “There is nothing you or anyone else can do to make that happen. Do you understand?”

Mouth agape, she managed, “I’ll be right back with your drinks,” then turned too quickly directly into a busboy and the business end of the steak knife he was carrying.

Death rolled his eyes. He placed his hand on her bleeding abdomen. “I said nothing,” he reiterated, clearly vexed at the need to prove himself. He removed his hand from her now unscathed stomach and returned to his seat.

“Wow,” said George. “I’m impressed. I didn’t think you had it in you.”

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Ketchup With Us #3

Posted on October 1, 2012 | 7 comments

MEL: Just write about a similar story from your past, Michele. It’ll be easy.

ME: (under breath) Easy for YOU maybe … you unscrupulous THUG!

It’s Ketchup With Us time and my co-host, Mel at According to Mags, had a unique idea for the writing link-up. To illustrate it, she wrote about one of the many foolhardy misdeeds of her youth. Frankly, when I read it, I was appalled. Shocked. And appalled. There were a few moments there that I seriously considered backing out of this whole Ketchup thing with her. I mean, you think you know a person, right?

Anyway, I’m sorry to disappoint you guys but I have nothing that comes even close to Mel’s story. It’s not like I ever cheated on a science test and got grounded so I couldn’t go to the Adam Ant concert … or snuck out to toilet paper the boy around the corner’s house and put a big rainbow-y Rick Springfield bumper sticker on his car. No, sir. But doesn’t that so sound like the kind of thing that our friend, MEL, would do. (laughs condescendingly)

For a quick explanation of the link-up, click here. In short, Mel and I will post a picture or video with a writing prompt on the 1st and 15th of every month. All you need to do is respond in whatever form strikes your fancy. Be creative. And, with each prompt, we’ll feature a writer from the previous link-up. Which reminds me, we’re happy to honor one of the only boys brave enough to link up last week.

Our esteemed Ketchup With Us Featured Writer for today is …

Brain Tomahawk

The Rules of Play (Please check ’em out for us, guys!)

  1. Follow us on Twitter (Michele/Mel ) and Facebook (Michele /Mel)
  2. Post the ‘Ketchup With Us’ button (below) in the body of your post.
  3. Link your entry’s URL (not your blog URL) to the linky at the bottom of one of our posts.
  4. Tweet us your post. Please include both of our handles AND the hashtag #KetchupWithUs so we can RT you.
  5. Please turn off your captcha. (Don’t know what that means? It’s when your commenters are forced to enter nonsensical codes to establish their non-roboticness. But, seriously, robots HATE writing link-ups. And Ketchup. So, I think we’re good.)

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‘KETCHUP WITH US’ – Prompt #3

Tell us in 57 WORDS OR LESS about a time you were caught red-handed, like a rat in a trap, with your hand in the cookie jar.

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Ketchup With Us #2

Posted on September 15, 2012 | 6 comments

“19 posts! NINETEEN, MEL!”

I texted this nerd message to Mel at the closing of our first ever Ketchup With Us link-up! We couldn’t have been happier about it. You guys were awesome and we truly loved reading every single one of your entries. But now we know what it feels like to be the jerks who have to (randomly!) select ONE post to feature in each link-up. Yes, I said random. Never mind the fact that this post mentions goat’s milk … which brings me to cheese … which … wait, where was I?

So, our esteemed Ketchup With Us Featured Writer for today is …

Honey Badger

What’s that? You’ve never even heard of the Ketchup With Us link-up? (To veterans) Okay, will those of you already in the know please step to the back so we can get the others up to speed? Thank you. Feel free to take out your independent novels and read a few minutes. (To rookies) Hello, new friends. For a quick, three-minute Cliff’s Notes version of what’s happening, click here. On the 1st and 15th of each month, Mel and I will post the same picture or video with a writing prompt on our blogs. Please respond in 57 WORDS OR LESS in the form of a story, a poem, a song you wrote in the shower, a cat food jingle or whatever strikes your fancy. All we seek is creativity. Each week, we’ll post a Featured Writer who poured it all out for us in the previous link-up.

The Rules of Play … plus a few other friendly suggestions:

  1. Follow us on Twitter (Mel/Michele) and Facebook (Mel /Michele)
  2. Post ‘Ketchup With Us’ button (below) in the body of your post.
  3. Link your entry’s URL (not your blog URL) to the linky at the bottom of one of our posts.
  4. Tweet us your post with the hashtag #KetchupWithUs so we can RT your ketchup-y self.
  5. Please turn off your captcha for commenting. It makes people angry. I won’t say who.

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Attention! ¡Atención! Achtung!

Gratuitous ODNT plug – Today’s prompt reminds me of a post I wrote a while back entitled Let’s Embarrass Me. Topic: Famous Crushes. In case that’s at all relevant.

‘KETCHUP WITH US’ – Prompt#2

Tell us in 57 words or less about your biggest celebrity crush from childhood. Or, you know, now. Either way.

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According to ODNT (A Special Birthday Surprise for a Friend)

Posted on September 1, 2012 | 6 comments

Guapo: (drumming fingers on desk) What are YOU going to write?

Me: (sucking down coffee) I don’t know. (rocking back and forth on haunches) I’m trying to think.

Guapo: You know the other girls are already done, right? Lance, too. I think he even set his to music.

Me: (rolling eyes) I know. I heard. (sighing defeatedly) Mel makes this look so damned easy on According to Mags.

Guapo: (shrugging shoulders) Well, in her defense, she does have two adorable kids.

Me: (rising to feet defensively) And …?

Guapo: (recoiling in fear) Calm down. Your kids are great, too. I just meant hers were still little.

Me: (shaking head & sitting) Oh, my God. I know. I’m sorry. I just (starting to cry) … I mean, how does she do it?

Guapo: I don’t know, Michele. I don’t know. (refilling coffee cup) Maybe it’s a West Virginia thing.

I’m writing this post today for my friend, Mel at According to Mags. Today is her birthday. And a few of her writing pals and I got together to assemble this little surprise. To view her other birthday salutes, be sure to click the links for all of my fellow party givers listed at the bottom of this post.

But let’s talk a little more about Mel. She and I met online via our love of writing. Just like eHarmony … but for like-minded friends. We even traveled and roomed together last month for a writing conference in NYC. And … when neither stole the other’s kidney, uploaded naked shower pictures to the internet or stood over staring creepily at the other while sleeping … we deemed it a success.

So, without further verbosity on my part, please allow me to share The Best of Mel (According to ODNT). Go visit her when you can and say hi. You won’t be sorry. She’s a lovely, do-anything-for-you, give-you-the-shirt-off-her-back kind of girl. But, seriously, if you’re only going to get her shirt … well, dude, you’re a creeper. Move on.

Check out some of my favorite ATM posts:

I could go on and on. But you can stop by her place any time and see for yourself. Just be sure to leave everything where you found it. I’m not sure if Mel’s a the-ceramic-penguin-always-faces-due-south-kind-of-person or not, so let’s not tempt fate. I do not wish to be hobbled.

(DID YOU SEE THAT MOVIE, MEL? WELL, DID YOU?)

Oh, and before I go, if you didn’t already see it, Mel and I are starting a little project today called ‘Ketchup with Us.’ It’s a semi-monthly writing exercise that we’ll be hosting on both of our sites. To learn more about it, you can read Mel’s post or mine after you finish snooping through all of her other stuff above.

Happy Birthday, Mel. Wish I was there in person to celebrate!

Click to meet my partners in crime for Mel’s birthday party:

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Ketchup with Us #1

Posted on September 1, 2012 | 9 comments

Hear Ye! Hear Ye! It’s Here (Ye) … our very first Link-Up! 

Mel at According to Mags and I have paired up to bring you some shenanigans of the ketchup variety. And … if you’re staring at the screen wondering “What in the WORLD is this lunatic talking about?” … click here for a three-minute, Cliff’s Notes version of what’s happening all around you. Now, before we proceed any further, I must go over the official rules of this assignment. (Puts on reading glasses, clears throat and bangs gavel. Mel makes a note to hide obnoxious gavel before the next post.)

On the 1st and 15th of each month — (loses concentration to interruption) You. Yes, you, madam. In the back. Please put your hand down. We haven’t even started. … What? Well, I’m sure Mel brought her own Cadbury Mini-Eggs. … Please calm down, madam. Yes, it is wonderful that you’re her “Number One Fan” but I think she’ll just stick to eating the ones she brought from home. (Whispers to security, “Could someone please get this nut job outta here? She’s creeping out the regulars.”) Okay. Now, where was I?

On the 1st and 15th of each month, Mel and I will post the same picture or video with a writing prompt on our blogs. We ask you to respond in 57 words or less. It can be a story, a poem, a song you wrote in the shower, a cat food jingle or whatever strikes your fancy. All we seek is creativity. Each week, we’ll post a Featured Blogger who poured it all out for us in the previous link-up.

Here’s how you play:

  1. Follow Mel and Michele on Twitter.
  2. Follow Mel and Michele on Facebook.
  3. Post fancy schmancy ‘Ketchup With Us’ button (below) in the body of your post.
  4. Use the hashtag #KetchupWithUs on Twitter to help spread the ketchup-y goodness.

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‘KETCHUP WITH US’ – Prompt#1

Tell us in 57 words or less the best advice you ever received from someone older than you that you admire.

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a mom blog community!

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