Tag Archives: one thousand dollars

Please Help Make My Cat’s Dream a Reality!


My cat has a dream. And it’s a simple one. He’s always wanted to roll around in $1000 cash. I know. I think it’s a weird dream for a cat, too. I totally would’ve thought birds. Or some kind of smelly fish. But that’s what he said. And, as you can see, he’s been practicing.

20121005-172230.jpg

He’s only worth $40 in this shot.

Want to help make his dream come true? All you have to do is CLICK THE IMAGE BELOW. Then, when the link opens,  READ it and … by all means … LIKE it. Even if you hate it.

20121005-204310.jpg

Oh, and there’s one more thing. Please SHARE the book. HOWEVER and WHEREVER you can. Here are a few suggestions:

  • Facebook, Twitter & Pinterest
  • Public bathroom stalls
  • Handheld signs at traffic intersections
  • Small, tasteful tattoos
  • Church bulletins
  • Graffiti on interstate overpasses
  • Commandeering the department store intercom while no one is watching to make an announcement
  • Tiny sandwich boards fashioned to your pets or children
  • Skywriting
  • Shoe polish messages on your car windows (and all others in the office parking lot)

Too much? Fine. Then, just do the first one. Remember, this is Milo we’re talking about. Is there anything you wouldn’t do for him?

P.S. I’ll further sweeten the pot. Using the comments below, you are invited to submit questions you want me to answer if I win.  Duh, all submissions must be PG-13 or below.  In the event of my victory, I will pick one at random and answer it.

20120407-223706.jpg

 

Help! Baby Needs a New Pair of Boobs!


You guys, I’m a finalist!

My pals at Britely just selected my Brite book entitled Kids Today are Soft – and Here’s Why as one of the five finalists eligible to win $1000 this week. Dave says I’m on my way to earning a boob job. If I win this contest and add it to the winnings from a few weeks ago for my Back to School ABCs flip book, then I’ve earned about 25% of the money.

Together, We Could Earn One Half of One Boob! 

Of a better campaign slogan, I cannot think. Maybe I should lend it out to the dudes in Washington this fall. Anyway … if you have three minutes today, please click the image below and travel back to your sad youth with me. And, if you LIKE it and (best of all!) SHARE it for me … well, now you guys are going to make me cry.

20120921-142218.jpg

Oh, yeah. And don’t forget. I promised on Twitter that I would COOK and EAT SPAM on camera if I won. So, there’s that, too. Tell your friends!

20120407-223706.jpg